Long John Nebel

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Long John Nebel : biography

June 11, 1911 – April 10, 1978

Nebel often asked pointed questions of his guests when he saw logical fallacies or inconsistencies in their stories. He did not suffer fools gladly, unless the fool was exceptionally entertaining. Still, he was rather sympathetic in at least offering guests a forum to state their claims.

When programs dealt with health and exercise, Nebel was fond of saying: "I am a lover, not an athlete." He also popularized the expression "wack-a-ding-hoi" for an idea or guest he believed was a little "crazy". When asked why his television show was no longer on the air, Nebel would respond that he was not good-looking enough to be on television. His friendly, good-humored approach was one of the great reasons for his popularity.

Regular guests

As noted above, Jackie Gleason was a frequent guest. On one show, Gleason famously offered US$100,000 to anyone who could offer physical proof of aliens visiting Earth (Gleason later upped the amount to US$1 million, although it was never claimed). Another memorable show found Gleason undertaking a sharp—occasionally even savage—debate with publisher Gray Barker. Gleason took Gray to task for presenting largely unsubstantiated tales of the Men in Black and contactees as factual.

The two most frequent guests on his radio show were science fiction writers Lester del Rey and Frederik Pohl. Each appeared on more than 400 of Nebel’s broadcasts. Nebel also had philosopher Mortimer Adler and James Randi on frequently.

Sponsors

Nebel’s sponsors included some unusual products. For example, the Kelso Trot Calculator was, according to Nebel, developed by a NASA scientist, who was an occasional guest on his program. Basically a slide rule, the "calculator" was designed to pick horse racing winners.

Nebel’s commercials were often as entertaining as the program itself. Nebel was a master story teller who could spin yarns around the virtues of his sponsors. Commercials often ran several minutes. His seven-minute commercial for a pornographic movie ("It Happened in Hollywood") was unforgettable. Apparently, he had not reviewed the copy before reading it cold on the air and he fell victim to uncontrollable fits of laughter throughout his long and fruitless attempt to read it. Another long running sponsor was Ho-Ho’s Chinese Food – "Ho means Good, Ho-Ho means Good-Good".

UFOs

Flying saucers were in the news regularly in the mid-1950s, and were a frequent topic on Nebel’s show. Guests related to this subject included retired Marine Corps Major Donald Keyhoe, contactees George Adamski and George Van Tassel, and skeptics like Arthur C. Clarke and Lester del Rey. Nebel discussed the so-called Shaver Mystery, the Flatwoods monster, the Nazca Lines, and many other uncommon subjects.

Nebel gave a forum to Otis T. Carr, an Oklahoman who claimed to have discovered the secret of flying saucer propulsion, by studying the works of Nikola Tesla. With some of his regular panelists, Nebel journeyed to Oklahoma City for the unveiling of Carr’s saucer. (Carr was later convicted of fraud and jailed after he took several hundred thousand dollars from investors, and never produced his prototype.)

Pranks

Nebel was not above a few pranks, all in the name of showmanship and ratings: on one occasion, for example, he colluded with a friend to offer testimony supporting a guest’s claims of astral projection.

Nebel spent weeks on his show developing a tale for his audience that the Empire State Building was rotated on giant ball bearings in the wee hours of the morning. At first Nebel said the motion was almost imperceptible. As the prank developed over time, Nebel began telling callers that if they visited the Empire State Building very late at night, they would find the shops at ground level had switched location to the block around the corner.

Nebel also was fond of telling his audience that the finest candle wicks were grown on "wick farms" located in the Midwest.